I have been naive, been too irresponsible, immature, been too lazy.
People who know me always think that my ideas are crazy and it can't be done (my closest friends). But to a some other people, it is always something new. I'm sorry if i can't join the crowd because i have my own way, i make my own way, i do not follow, and therefore i don't like to be a follower.
Well, i know why people think i'm crazy, because crazy people only talk, they do not do. In cantonese this is call fan jin, or chi sin. I'm fine with it. Even my parents say that i'm dreaming. Well it's okay, because i know whatever i say i will do it. Sooner or later.
I made my 1st move. Which is to stop my studies, to feel the society, the work pressure, the hard work that people go through by working because they want that 2 bucks to feed their children. I want to feel what it is like to use my own money to survive.
2nd, i want to solve my relationship problem with ms, but i don't think it went well. I'm sorry because i think i have let her down. Indeed i did. Thinking back about the problems we're going through, i see that girls are damn cha bou, they will tell you nothing and they expect you to know. I'm sorry but i'm only human, i can only give you my heart but i can't read your thoughts.
3rd, coming up to sg snail definitely strengthen my relationship with my cousins. I hope it will bring us prosperity in the future and definitely a more harmonious family. It has been really a year since we talk like we use to, i'm sorry i wasn't there for you guys. I'm here now.
4th, paying up my debts. Yes, i'm very used to using my grandparent's money to buy stuffs. E.g. Handphones. I bought the 2nd n95 by borrowing money from my grandpa. I have to somehow pay up the debt so i can enjoy my life again as it is. Now i did.
5th, making my parents proud. I'm very happy to see them smiling again for 1 year 8 months and 3 days later. They smile because they know that richard has proved himself useful. My dad even congratulated me for making the right decision.
6th, making my way into the working world. I see that now my textbook really thought me some useful stuff to be used in life. Well, it's the marketing stuff. Getting back to my books while working broadens my scope.
7th, i learn things myself. The hard way, i don't think i would prefer to be fed by the silver spoon. Why? I don't like to be spoon fed, only if i'm too lazy or if i want to enjoy the ways of being spoon fed.
Anyway, i just want you all to know that this relationship problem has nothing to do with ms. Yes, she fell for another guy but it is because i can't prove myself. We're only 20 and yes we do have the liberty to make choices.
I choose to make my life a better place for myself and maybe my future wife. Too bad that we can't walk side by side together but i wish that you will be treated better. Hopefully karma wont happen on . Good luck. Thanks for the knock on the head, it's painful but i learn.
It's my fault all these has happened. I'm sorry.
Mungkin nanti kita akan bertemu lagi.
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Good day and goodnight
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